One day, the great psychologist Abraham Maslow spoke about human needs in his famous pyramid. The bottom of pyramid referred to basic human needs. But the last two top of pyramid referred to psychological needs. It referred to self esteem and self actualization respectively.
This means that each one of us needs to feel the appreciation of society to him or in simple words: Needs to love and be loved, needs to win attention of others. It is normal, instinctive thing like life and food but in advanced level of human life.
This appreciation makes sort of satisfaction for anyone and so important for us at all. So, a lot of us always look for to make something effective in society or at least between his relatives and friends. Not only for hear the words of admiration or thanks, but also for the self actualization. This actually makes something of Character Attractiveness which it grows every day with each achievement.
Also, when we speak about Character Attractiveness, we speak about vital and instinctively call in the human soul. It is growing with us like everything. So, when you were a child, teen, lad and even young man you look for anything which can attract attention of people around you.
This was instinctively matter, but after self improvement studies we can summarize Character Attractiveness in 3 main secrets:
1. Good Manners.
Good Manners is an international language that everyone can speak over the world. All religions with no exceptions urge the good manners and this is the shortest way to reach people heart.
You may heard about saying of Mohammed (The Prophet of Muslims) when said “The best one to God is the best one to his friends, and the best neighbor to God is the best in good manners to his neighbor.” Or you may read saying of Christ when he said “Love each one of yours and forgive each one of yours.”
Good Manners is the required virtue in any society and this of course a fact which doesn’t differ by two.
Good Manners is the rare goods between people and you can’t buy it by money or lend it from friends.
Good Manners is an immeasurable thing, so you can gain what you can and progress every day in several ways.
Good Manners is the beauty which turns ugly person to handsome one. I’m sure that you met a beautiful girl before or a handsome boy, and you may impressed by his face but when you looked at his soul, you found a blackness you may can’t endure it. The same thing, you may meet a not beautiful face but behind this face you may find a lot of treasures.
Any person can gain with his good manners what he can’t get by any other way. And be sure you can gain love and respect of others when they discover how you carry in heart a lot of treasures.
2. The Elegant Appearance.
Elegant Appearance is the second corner in Attractiveness triangle. In fact I needn’t to speak a lot about Elegant Appearance because it is a natural behavior in people generally, with both bad and good people. But I have a funny story about the importance of Elegant Appearance.
Once, in German and while a police soldier is walking in the street late, he saw tramp man in the same street. This man was disheveled hair, tacky, smelly and so dirty. In fact he was completely uncomfortable man.
Solider made his duty and catch this strange man and led him to the police station. But once solider entered the officer room with this dirty man, the officer stood up in a dazzle and respect to shake hand with this dirty man … all of this was in front of stupor eyes of the solider.
But the real surprise – for the solider – was when officer told him that this dirty man is Pride of Germany and her genius Musician … Ludwig Van Beethoven.
Try to imagine the solider face in that moment. But I’m sure, you will excuse him.
Try to do the experiment with two men whom are equal in the scientific status and one of them has really elegant appearance and the other was shabby … who will gain your psychological comfort more than other?
3. Wide Culture.
It is regrettable for me when I meet someone who is a good appearance and real gentleman but after while I discover that he has an empty mind.
There are a lot of definitions of Culture but in fact I remember two of them now and the both are expressive pretty much.
First: It is everything stays in human mind after forgetting everything.
Second: It is to be a specialist in something and know a little about everything.
And in fact, the second definition leads us to two types of separated culture types … The Specialization Culture and The General Culture.
The Specialization Culture: It is to be a specialist in a particular field, and so that you spend a lot of your money, time and concentration to learn more about this field. You read in books, internet, and seminars and learn under professional specialists to be really informative in your field. (A Specialist in something)
The General Culture: It is to know a little about a lot of information in separated fields, whether it links with your field or not. (Know a little about Everything)
The only way I know to learn more about everything is: Reading.
And as you see today, reading is now a past. People now doesn’t read because the canned information on the internet.
In the past when our professor asks us to make a research, we went ahead to the library and spend the whole day between tons of books to get the required information and may be borrow 2 or 3 books to home to complete our research. But now it is different. If you want to know anything about anything, you needn’t to make anything more than type it on search box and google it.
Canned information made us so lazy to make a real search or at least take a book to read. And day by day the informative person became a rare currency and almost disappeared.
Finally, may Character Attractiveness have another secrets but this was The Character Attractiveness Secrets which I could collect it here: Good Manners, Elegant Appearance and Wide Culture.